Happy Thanksgiving!

"I could just sit, I could just sit and wait for all Your goodness, hope to feel Your presence.

And I could just stay, I could just stay right where I am and hope to feel You, hope to feel something again.

And I could hold on, I could hold on to who I am and never let You change me from the inside.

And I could be safe, I could be safe here in Your arms and never leave home, never let these walls down.

But You have called me higher, You have called me deeper, and I'll go where You will lead me Lord.

You have called me higher, You have called me deeper, and I'll go where You will lead me Lord.

Where You lead me, where You lead me Lord."

Yeah, I know that you are probably, most likely, shocked at this picture because we are still kinda just as shocked (especially Mark haha!). However, we are getting use to the idea pretty quickly since this has been brewing since about September maybe. It was back then that I was looking through my Facebook feed and the sweetest face came across it. Since I follow so many advocating pages and people posting photo after photo of children in need of a family, I have seen cuteness after cuteness day after day and would pray they would find their family.  This little spunky monkey was different.  I immediately fell head over hills in love with her and knew without a doubt we were the family she needed.  There was not a question in my mind.  I "knew" with Kennedi and Brayden too, but this time was different. There was just something special about this girl. Funny thing is, we were done adding to our family. D.O.N.E. DONE.  The adoption of a teen boy was, and is, the hardest thing I have ever done and I could not see myself adopting again...at least not anytime soon.  However, I have learned to never say never when it comes to things, especially where God is concerned.

So I began to advocate for her and pray for her daily.  Thinking maybe if someone came forward to adopt her, I would feel better and could stop thinking so much about her.  We absolutely do not have even one penny for yet another adoption and have really no way of coming up with that large amount of money so I figured she must be meant for another family and I should help her find them.  I contacted the agency rep who posted about this girl but was told they were still waiting for her file to arrive from China but that many other families were wanting her file as well.  I was happy so many families were interested in adopting her.  At the same time, I felt myself completely bummed that she wouldn't be coming home to our family and I still could not stop thinking about her.  I continued to pray for this sweet girl and her potential family.  Then one morning, around the end of October, another agency rep from the same agency commented on a post of another child I just happened to see, saying they would be getting a file for a 5 year old girl soon.  I just happened to send her a message asking about this girl she was talking about.  I almost didn't ask because like I said "we are NOT adopting again!".  She responded back with "let us know if you would like to see her file when it comes in".  I responded with "I fell in love with her the day I saw her however I was told many families were wanting to see her file, and in my mind I still felt it was impossible for us to bring her home".  A little while later the agency called me and said that I could have first dibs on her file if I submit to them our application and the application fee!  Oh.My.Heart!! I couldn't believe my ears! God, what are you doing here?? We still don't have even one penny to adopt another child and now I have to say yes to the agency and submit our application so that we are not passed up and her file goes to another family! I wrestled with this situation with God over and over again.  How can You ask us to step out in faith with the looming task of coming up with $30,000 in just a few short months?  I am having such little faith right now when I need it the most!  Why does adoption have to be so costly?  You provided every penny for our last two adoptions, why can't I trust You this time around?  However, I know the power of our God and I could not give up so easily on this little girl in Wuxi without even trying!

Some people think adoption comes so easy for our family but in all honesty it does NOT.  It is so terrifying to trust sometimes. I hear all the time people say "I would adopt but we just cannot afford it". We cannot afford it either. Not one bit. We couldn't afford it the last two times and we cannot afford it now. But God has shown us time and time again that He will provide a way and oh the blessings we would have missed had we said back in 2006 that we cannot afford it and given up?!?!  It didn't take too long to determine that we have to step out in COURAGEOUS FAITH to bring this girl home to our family if it was something God was asking us to do (and we totally feel like it is)!  We cannot turn our backs on God and how he has perfectly orchestrated this whole thing...WE CANNOT!  "I tell you the truth, if you had faith even as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'move from here to there', and it would move.  Nothing would be impossible for you." ~Matthew 17:20.  Here's to faith as small as a mustard seed knowing that nothing will be impossible with God!

We have already heard comments like "again?", "when will you stop adopting?", "you have enough to handle as it is", "but she has a significant special need, are you sure you know what you are doing? Why would you choose that?"  Honestly, yes, we do know what we are doing.  We are following where God leads us and right now He is leading us to Wuxi to bring our girl HOME.  A child with no special needs could possibly give you more challenges than a child with special needs. She is just as much a child of God as any other child and will not be defined by her diagnosis. We are not here to live a life selfishly so that we can have an easy, "all about me" life.  We are here to live life to the fullest by following Jesus and loving one another regardless of the cost.  I know without a doubt in my mind that this girl will be beyond a blessing to our family as well as to everyone she meets. And so, instead of judging us or thinking we are crazy, would you just please pray for us and this journey we are embarking on as well as our sweet girl who waits for us across the world?

I was trying to wait to announce this big news until we had her file and approval from China so we could share her picture with you on social media (China rules) but I couldn't wait any longer. If you want to see how adorable our girl is and hear more about her, text, email or message me or let me know when I see you.

Happy Thanksgiving!

But You have called me higher, You have called me deeper, and I'll go where You will lead me Lord.

You have called me higher, You have called me deeper, and I'll go where You will lead me Lord.

Where You lead me, where You lead me Lord."